Raising our children is not a "privilege"
My thoughts on the uncontroversial issue of parental choice.
You might be wondering why I subtitled this article by describing this issue as uncontroversial. Well, that’s what bothers me so much about the recent debates about parental choice and gender identity in schools. The topic is not and should not be controversial.
In the last month, under pressure from parent groups, premiers across the country have come out with policy directives that would make sure parents are always informed of what happens at their children’s schools.
Primarily the new policies are meant to direct schools that if a child under the age of 16 wants to change their gender identity at school, that staff must inform the parents.
Why is this controversial? I don’t even have to make an argument against the idea of transitioning children to show you that these new policies are just common sense.
If my child is going to go through the steps to change their gender identity in school, it means that their current identity is very much bothering them or causing them a lot of stress. If my child is very much bothered about a subject they are learning and is stressing them out tremendously.
Then I need to know. It doesn’t matter what my viewpoint is on these matters. I need to be informed. That’s common sense.
If my child confides to the school about any serious life issue that is causing them serious mental stress, I need to know. I especially need to know if this issue is one where it might lead to life-altering treatments (many young teens who change their identity at school go on to start life-changing treatments such as taking puberty blockers).
After these new policies were announced many Liberals and 2SLGBTQ+ organizations cried out in protest. Their arguments don’t stand up though.
They claim that some parents won’t accept their children and could have a different viewpoint. They may debate the best course of treatment to deal with their confused teen.
A summary of their argument goes like this:
SOME parents will mistreat their child if they are informed of what the child does at school.
ALL teachers and schools (run and paid for by the government) are perfect and have childrens’ best interest at heart and NONE will ever mistreat a child.
SO, if a child discloses to a teacher (100% of which ARE perfect and have the best interest of the child at heart) that they are troubled about something, the teacher is obligated to withhold the information from the parents (which ARE NOT 100% perfect and do not have the best interest of the child at heart).
This argument was summed up by Liberal journalist Rachel Gilmore when she compared the “parental rights” debate as rooting for the terrible dad (Danny Devito) in the movie Matilda or the amazing, perfect teacher (Miss Honey).
This argument that some parents are bad but all teachers are good, just doesn’t stand up. Because it’s not the reality. If we operate under the assumption that every dad is Danny Devito and every teacher is Miss Honey, then why share any information with parents? Why even let the kids go home at the end of the school day? Wouldn’t they all be better off taught in government run institutions full-time from dusk till dawn? Why would we ever let them go back to their terrible parents who won’t accept who they are and might teach them “misinformation”?
Prior governments have tried this and now we have national holidays to remember the travesty and harm of those historical policies that put the authorities above the parents.
Ultimately this comes down to whom has the best interest of the child at heart. The school/authority/government or the parent. I think history will tell us that we should side with the parents.
Yes some parents aren’t perfect. Yes most teachers are amazing. But we do not live in a black and white world.
If a teacher truly believes that by sharing details about a child to parents puts them in danger, there are actions they can take (i.e. notifying the police). But they cannot withhold information from ALL parents just because some may have a different viewpoint.
Being informed is a privilege?
I was trying not to get to wrapped up in this subject but then when I saw one of the biggest newspapers in the country come out with this headline yesterday, I couldn’t stay silent.
Sorry Toronto Star. Sorry Justin Trudeau. Sorry anyone who thinks this headlines is at all appropriate. Knowing what happens in my kid’s schools is not a “privilege”. Being informed on what subject they take, how they perform, any serious issues that affect their mental health or physical health IS NOT A PRIVILEGE. IT’S MY RIGHT.
If a child is doing very poorly in a certain subject but tells the teacher that their parents will be very upset with them if they disclose this, should the teacher withhold that information as well?
What if a 10 year old child tells the teacher that she has lots of anxiety and hasn’t been able to sleep because of a divorce at home? But asks the teacher to keep this a secret because she doesn’t want her parents to worry about her.
This has nothing to do with how one views the debate around trans issues. This is about parental choice and who has the best interest of children.
Parents or the government?
It's like saying the aboriginal schools were great, so Rachel etc want us to do that for everyone. For ever no exceptions.
I say that's crazy. All the times my kids complained to me because of school. I told them they didn't have to go if they didn't want to wear a mask. Would the people who think kids should have sexual body parts lopped off have let them stay home when theres C19 mask theater about?
I also told my children that if they see a teacher doing something unethical I'm okay with them filming it. Schools say they will expel you for showing their sins.
No one got fired, for forcing children to learn about felching in Lumsden SK.
When my kids were little we told them people who want them to keep secrets from their parents are not to be trusted. Ie why did Trudeau stop teaching, Canadian investigative journalists need to ask.
Btw since leaving school 0 teachers have asked me or mine how my children are doing, they don't even send Christmas or birthday cards.
They care that much.
Very well said! We as parents should be informed of what is happening with our children. We need info... Thank you